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Don’t Mess With Mother Nature – Part Two

So, our hero grabs his rod and reel, gets down on his hands
and knees, coughing and gagging, with tears in his eyes,
expertly flings the line towards the skunk. About the 37th
time, he got it. Not really wanting to, he reeled it in.

The optimal place to rid himself of his “catch” was away from
the house, across the two lane highway, and into the woods.
Each way down the road, still a good ways off, cars are coming.
The family genius caculates he can get a running start up to and
across the road and just on the other side, give the reel a hefty
sling, cast the line a good 75 to 100 feet into the woods, cut
the line, and get back before the traffic passes.

Good solution. Except for the fact that Professor Quick Draw
forgot to factor into his calculation, how smooth the soles are
on cowboy boots and how slick asphalt roads get after the dew falls.

At full speed, with the dead skunk flying like a flag on his rod
and reel over his shoulder, he leans back and starts the best
cast of his life, when his feet slip out from under him. Momentum
slides him to the middle of the road. When he comes to a stop,
he’s looking straight up at the stars….and the stinky dead
skunk coming down right at him! He manages to get his head out of
the way, but, his right shoulder and arm got a direct hit.

No time to get up or give in to the involuntary retching, he had
to quickly roll into the ditch to avoid the on coming traffic.
After a while he regained control of his body. Staggering to his
feet, this man among men retrieved his rod and reel, skunk still
attached, gave it one last cast to it’s final resting place in
the woods, cut the line, and wobbled home.

His wife made him stand outside, strip butt naked, bath in tomato
juice, and sprayed him down with the water hose. Then burned his
shirt and jeans.

These days my brother is extremely patient and tolerant of Mother Natures
creatures. “If they wander into your area, let ’em be, they’ll leave the
way they came in.” I wonder what made him such a gentle man.

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